The following jokes are from No Laughing Matter by Steven Lukes
of Oxford and Itzhak Gelnoor of Hebrew University of Jerusalem.
The selections are from the June 5, 1989 issue of Newsweek (review
by George F. Will).
Little Boy: What will communism be like when perfected?
His Father: Everyone will have what he [...]
A bear walks into a bar in Billings, Montana and sits down. He bangs on the bar with his paw and demands a beer. The bartender approaches and says, We dont serve beer to bears in bars in Billings. The bear, becoming angry, demands again that he be served a beer. The bartender tells him [...]
Top 15 Signs That Youve Had Too Much Of the 90s
15. You try to enter your password on the microwave
14. You havent played solitaire with a real deck of cards in years.
13. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
12. You e-mail your son in [...]
Patient: Doctor, what should I do if my temperature goes up five more points?
Doctor: Sell!
Joke found on http://www.ahajokes.com
1. Q: What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?
A: A good start!
2. Q: How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
A: His lips are moving.
3. Q: Whats the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?
A: [...]
A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night hes doing a show in a small club in a small town in Arkansas.
With his dummy on his knee, hes going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting: Ive heard [...]
The boss returned from lunch in a good mood and called the whole staff
in to listen to a couple of jokes he had picked up. Everybody but one girl
laughed uproariously. Whats the matter? grumbled the boss. Havent you
got a sense of humor?
I dont have to laugh, she said. [...]
Musician Jokes - In Score Order
How do you get two piccolos to play in perfect unison?
Shoot one.
Whats the definition of a minor second?
Two flutists playing in unison.
Whats the difference between an oboe and an onion?
Nobody cries when you chop up an oboe.
Whats the difference between playing an English [...]
A ventriloquist had just finished his polack joke routine when a huge, drunk polack confronted him, Im sick of your polack jokes and Im going to knock the shit out of you. Im sorry, it was all in good fun, replied the comedian. The polack retorted, I was talking [...]
New Family - Jerry Seinfeld and Bill Gates Ad (Long Version)
