During the Great Depression, two Jewish guys are walking down the street when they happen by a Baptist Church. They see a big sign posted that says, join our church and you get fifty dollars.
One of the Jewish men stops walking and stares at the sign. His friend turns to him and says, Murray, whats [...]
Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a salad, and a note explaining that you think he could stand to lose a few pounds. While hes in the house, go find his sleigh and write him a speeding ticket. Leave him a note, explaining that youve gone away for the holidays. Ask if he [...]
Two young nuns having just been ordained were on a holiday in New York City and were standing in front of the gorilla cage at the Bronx Zoo.
The gorilla took one look at this beautiful young nun, bent the bars, leapt to the ground and pumped her like crazy. Then he went back into his [...]
A father said, Son, the object of dating is to SCORE! And to do that, you have to give the woman something. So when you pick up your date later, make sure you have some flowers or chocolates to give her. Girls go crazy over that stuff. The more you give, the more you get!
So, [...]
There were two good friends (roommates, actually) at a University. One of them was a Chinese and the other was a Jew.
One day they went drinking and had a little too much. Upon staggering back home, they got into some stupid mindless argument. One thing led to another and suddenly the Jewish guy was pummeling [...]
Years ago, CBS had a popular little series called Gilligans Island. There is, however, a dark secret about this comedy you may never have realized. The island is a direct representation of Hell.
Nobody on the island wants to be there, yet none are able to leave. Each one of the characters represents one of the [...]
Calls For Tragic Death Of Streisand
With sales of Princess Di memorabilia falling off sharply after a record
1997, collectible-plate-industry leaders Monday called for the tragic
death of beloved entertainer Barbra Streisand.
For the 1998 Christmas season to be anywhere near as successful as last
years, we need a heartbreaking, untimely end to a wonderful life that we
can commemorate with [...]
A friend just got back from a holiday ski trip to Utah with the kind of story that warms the cockles of anybodys heart. Conditions were perfect, 12 below, no feeling in the toes, basic numbness all over. The Tell me when were having fun kind of day.
One of the women in the group [...]
On the third day I was dust, ordinary common dust like you see on a country road in a dry spell, nothing expected of me, me expecting nothing neither.
On the sixth day he comes along and blows. In my own image too, he says, like he was doing me a favor.
Sometimes I think if hed [...]
New Family - Jerry Seinfeld and Bill Gates Ad (Long Version)
