Haios!Funny Jokes, Funny pictures, Free Flash Games, Wigi Games

Yo mommas so fat she waves a popsical stick around and cals it airconditioning

What does a nigger and an apple have in common?

You can find them both hanging from a tree in Mississippi.

Last time I saw a face like yours I fed it a banana.

30 Nasty Things A Woman Can Say To A Naked Man

1. Ive smoked fatter joints than that.
2. Ahhhh, its cute.
3. Why dont we just cuddle?
4. You know they have surgery to fix that.
5. Make it dance.
6. Can I paint a smiley face on it?
7. Wow, and your feet are so big.
8. Its OK, well work around it.
9. Will it squeak if I squeeze it?
10. Oh no… a flash headache.
11. (giggle and point)
12. Can I be honest with you?
13. How sweet, you brought incense.
14. This explains your car.
15. Maybe if we water it, itll grow.
16. Why is God punishing me?
17. At least this wont take long.
18. I never saw one like that before.
19. But it still works, right?
20. It looks so unused.
21. Maybe it looks better in natural light.
22. Why dont we skip right to the cigarettes?
23. Are you cold?
24. If you get me real drunk first.
25. Is that an optical illusion?
26. What is that?
27. Its a good thing you have so many other talents.
28. Does it come with an air pump?
29. So this is why youre supposed to judge people on personality.
30. I guess this makes me the early bird!!!

You are so poor that when you went up to your mom and asked her what you were having for dinner, she opened up her legs and said,Tuna!

Mirrors dont talk, but lucky for you, they dont laugh either.

All you want for Christmas is a hairline!

Youre so dumb, you put a quarter into a parking meter and said, Hey, wheres my gumball?

How do you kill all the mexicans in the world?

Bomb a swap meet.
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Why do all the mexicans go to a funeral?

For the free food.
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What do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill?

A mudslide.
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Why are black people afraid of motocycles?

Because they sound like theyre saying, Run niga niga niga, run niga niga niga…
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what do you call a bunch of white people in the middle of a larger group of black people?

A Ho-Ho.
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What do you call a bunch of white people in a yellow bus?

A twinkie.
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How do white people get away with breaking the law?

They say Sorry officer. I didnt know I couldnt do that.

A man walks into a bar one night. He goes up to the bar and asks for a beer.

Certainly, sir, thatll be 1 cent.

One penny?! exclaimed the guy.

The barman replied, Yes.

So, the guy glances over at the menu, and he asks, Could I have a nice juicy T-bone steak, with fries, peas, and a salad?

Certainly sir, replies the bartender, but all that comes to real money.

How much money? inquires the guy.

Four cents, he replies.

Four cents?! exclaims the guy. Wheres the guy who owns this place?

The barman replies, Upstairs with my wife.

The guy says, Whats he doing with your wife?

The bartender replies, Same as what Im doing to his business.