Haios!Funny Jokes, Funny pictures, Free Flash Games, Wigi Games

Q. What do Burger King and Michael Jackson have in common?

A. Why both slap thier meat between 4 year old buns.

What college did Michael Jackson attend?

Well, the trials over, and Michael got off… Whats ironic is that getting off is what got him in trouble in the first place.

Michael Jackson was in a room bumming George Michael. Suddenly Michael Jackson said I have to go now, but ill be back in five minutes, whatever you do dont wank. At that, Michael left.



Five minutes later Michael returned to find cum all over the ceiling and walls. What the hell happened here, I told you not to wank. But George replied I didnt; I farted

Whats the definition of mixed emotions?
– When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.

Whats the height of conceit?
– Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.

Whats the definition of macho?
– Jogging home from your own vasectomy

Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
– One is made of plastic and is dangerous for children to play with. The other is used to carry groceries.

Why dont blind people like to sky dive?
– Because it scares the heck out of the dog.

How do you double the value of a Yugo?
– You fill it with gas.

What do the LAPD and the Green Bay Packers have in common?
– Neither of them can stop a Bronco.

Have you heard George Michaels new song?
– Its called Zip Me Up Before You Go Go

I walked in a bar the other day and ordered a double.
– The bartender brings out a guy who looks just like me.

Whats the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
– Anyone can roast beef.

What is forty feet long and has eight teeth?
– The front row at a Willie Nelson concert.

Whats the difference between a lawyer and God?
– God doesnt think hes a lawyer.

Whats the weather like in Tahoe?
– Gloomy all over and Sonny around one tree.

Why did the chickhen cross the road?
to get to the other side
Why did David Beckham cross the road?
Because he likes chickhens

Q: Did you hear that Michael Jackson was taken to the Emergency Room?
A: He was choking on a small bone!

When Micheal Jacksons ex-girlfriend had his baby, Michael asked, Honey, its been nine months. When can I have sex again?

She said, Damn, Michael… at least let the kid learn how to walk first!

Right after Lisa Marie had Michael Jacksons baby, they went to see her gynecologist. After the babys exam, Michael asked the doctor, Doctor, how long will it be before we can have sex? The doctor replied, Well, Michael, you probably ought to wait until hes at least 10 or 11.

What did the lady at the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!